This week we are discussing Mirrorland by Carole Johnstone, Ch. 24-End.
Content Warning!!! This book contains situations and subjects related to: alcoholism, child abuse, domestic abuse, drug use, sexual assault, trauma, violence and suicide.
Spoiler Warning!!! This post is full of spoilers for Mirrorland by Carole Johnstone.
*Please note this book is considered a psychological thriller that contains heavy themes that may be upsetting or disturbing to some readers*
Discussion:
Discussion:
Michaela: Hello friends and welcome to our final discussion of Mirrorland! The ending of this book was a wild ride for me. Up until those last 20 pages I thought I knew where the story was going to end but then it all changed. We started off this section learning that Vik was indeed the one sending the messages for El and doing so by pretending to be Mouse. I suspected either him or one of El’s other friends to be doing that. El is definitely forward thinking but also very drama inspired when it came to her solution to helping Cat remember the past. I understand wanting Cat to remember for herself but what a way to make that happen.
Jacilyn: I’m not sure that Cat would have been able to remember if El hadn’t done it the way she did, honestly. Even just being in the house wasn’t enough to bring everything back. El’s diary pages and the emails from “Mouse” were the catalysts needed to get Cat to remember. I think the entire book set us up to suspect Ross, but the twists and turns of both the past AND the present kept my mind going the whole time. The truth of who Bluebeard is, the way he abused his children…. We see the entire cycle of trauma with the whole family. Grandpa, the Witch, Mouse, and their mom. It was heartbreaking, and although this family was on the extreme side of abuse and trauma, I think it’s important for people to see that abusers are not black and white. Nothing excuses what they do, but there is a lot that explains it - that context is important. My own mom was abusive, but a huge part of my healing process was realizing that there were other forces at play that led to the abuse I experienced - it wasn’t just her decisions.
Michaela: Cat’s memory suppression skills were a tough challenge that’s for sure. But I completely understand wanting to forget those things but forgetting isn’t always helpful to you as Cat learned. The book really led us to believe everything was Ross and to be fair he was the main reason leading to El’s “death”. El was experiencing depression and suicidal ideation, possibly she could have experienced those things without Ross’s influence but he had influence over her. He really was just a disgusting character, even as a child he clearly needed counseling. Losing his father by his mother moving him away and then also by suicide really messed with him and he needed help, but instead he tried to keep the only friends he felt he had even if they had to suffer something horrible to stay with him.
Child Ross was very creepy but I don’t know how much we can blame child logic, I feel like that’s a whole other conversation, but he continued to be possessive, abusive, and creepy as he got older. Ross reconnected with El and Cat when they were all around 19 years old and by that point Ross has no excuse for behaving the way he did. When we learned he was tricking El and Cat into “dating” him basically, the ick feeling was unbelievable. And he CARRIES THAT NOTE AROUND WITH HIM. Guys……I have no words. He doesn’t even deserve to go in the trash, it’s too nice. I immensely enjoyed reading how El framed Ross for her murder, and Cat visiting him during his life sentence and telling him “I know” after he insists he didn’t murder El. Oh my gods, shivers! Actual shivers ran through my body with that one.
Jacilyn: Even with all the ick I was feeling from Ross throughout the book, I was not expecting that he had been contacting El in secret, or that he organized El catching Cat and him in the act. I don’t think we can just blame his actions as a kid on child logic - I think he is mentally ill, and has a cruel streak to him. I think the trauma he experienced at a young age exacerbated that streak. The fact that he was willing to risk one or both of the girls DYING by “Bluebeard’s” hands in order to keep them there, with him…. It’s disgusting. And then buying the house and making El tell him exactly how each room was decorated, to continue this psychological torture? That gave me the biggest ick of all.
I was proud of Cat in the end, at that final confrontation with Ross. She held her own against him. I was terrified reading that part, honestly - I was so tense, holding my breath, just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I thought that the added touch of Cat using a lantern to attack Ross and keep him away, an ode to what she did to her own grandfather to protect her sister, was beautifully poetic. The lantern on the “ship” was always there to help her save herself. The way Rafiq was interrogating Ross at the scene once her and Logan arrived, too - that gave me goosebumps. She had just been watching, waiting. What a great detective.
Michaela: No I definitely don’t blame things on child logic, that kid needed so much help but at the same time kids can’t always comprehend the seriousness of situations. Even some adults cannot comprehend the abuse others experience. But child Ross needed a hefty amount of therapy and adult Ross needed to be supervised and in a facility.
Ross chasing Cat around the house, with Cat being warned by the bells in her head, I had to take small breaks every couple paragraphs. I was STRESSED. I didn’t think Cat was going to die in this book but also I didn’t know how hurt she was going to be by the end. Her knocking Ross out with the lantern was just *chef’s kiss*, truly a poetic writing choice. I really enjoyed Rafiq and Logan’s characters. Cat being comforted by both of their presence was beautiful and I love that they came to the funeral Cat had.
After all that happened, I was still terrified Cat wasn’t going to let go of her version of Ross in her head, it’s really hard to do that and I frankly did not know if she had it in her to do it alone. But she did and she is so much stronger for it. I think Cat will be so much happier and stronger in life now that she knows she has the ability to be strong without El and without Ross. She feels like her own person to me now who chooses to be with El in the end instead of needing to be with her.
Jacilyn: I think she’ll always kind of feel that draw to Ross, but I can’t really blame her - he was the only other child outside of Mouse that they got to see. He had a role in getting them out of their grandfather’s house… or so she thought, anyways. Plus the way he manipulated her, knowing exactly how to use her jealousy to his advantage. I don’t think it will ever go away entirely, but after her visit to the prison I think she’s able to leave him behind now. I think she got her closure.
I was FLOORED when Cat and El found each other. I had to read that section a few times to figure out if Cat was hallucinating again or if it was really what happened. But the moment we knew that El was still alive, I knew that Mouse probably was not. And yet somehow I still wasn’t expecting that Mouse had been their sister. The third sister. A triplet. God, I don’t even have the words to describe how much reading that broke my heart. I wish that Mouse could have gotten to end up at Santa Catalina with them, that she could have joined them on that boat at the end, to sail wherever they dreamed. She deserved that, just as much as Cat and El did.
Speaking of, I really wasn’t expecting this book to have a somewhat happy ending. I’ve read a lot of suspense/thriller books like this before and a lot of them leave you continuing to feel unsettled and uncomfortable at the end. I really enjoyed that I felt good about Cat and El’s futures at the end of this book.
Michaela: I’m glad this one had a happier ending because I was not a fan of the unsettling feeling. I did not want to still be stressed about this book after being done with it. Which just shows how good the writing in this book was. I thought the ending was really nice and El and Cat deserve to have a relationship with each other not based on survival and escapism, just fun. They didn’t get to spend that third life with Mouse, Iona, but they did bring her to Saint Catalina where she can rest and still experience the ocean in some way.
That’s all for this book, friends! It was a heavy one but a satisfying one at the end there I think. Until next time.
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